ElkelASegitsegHave you ever had a brilliant idea that you discussed with your partner, family or friends and then the following morning thought it was silly so you let it go with an embarrassed smile? Have you ever thought about what life you might be living had you realised these crazy ideas? You might have visited a lot of exciting places, may be organising fancy dress parties and film clubs; you could be running a café in town, writing a blog about your travels or teaching housewives to cook, and you may even have completed your first children’s book.

Napoleon Hill says “A goal is a dream with a deadline”. So all you have to do is set a date for your café opening and make a plan that you follow step by step to realise your dream. You will need a lot of great ideas, support and money, but basically this is how dreams are turned into reality. So why do so many dreams and plans get dumped? What gets in the way that stops us from taking action?

The answer is that we are human. And humans have their past, bad experiences, fear of the future, the unknown and others’ opinions; your inner voices warn you that it might be ‘too hard, too expensive, not for you’ or ‘you’re not worth it’; and your sensible self reminds you that after all things are fine as they are. The moment you start dreaming your defence mechanism switches on and produces thoughts that oppress your dreams, so your plans are doomed to failure even before you acted on them.

Given our human nature we find various ways to sabotage our own success. Create a badly structured goal and an insufficient plan and your dreams will inevitably be shattered. Thinking too much about your goal and the difficulties you may meet will also prove ‘you shouldn’t have done it in the first place’. Giving too little time and attention to planning, not considering obstacles and then giving up when meeting the first one will not work either. Do not expect success if it makes you anxious, if you fear failure, if you do not feel you are worthy or think you are selfish for chasing your own dreams; you cannot succeed if you believe the voices from the past that say you have never made it and this time is going to be no different.

So what to do then? Peel off your human skin, forget who you have been, plan carefully and simply do it? It is not that simple and not that impossible either. The key is to have the courage to ask for help. You are not on this Earth together with so many others to have to realise your dreams alone.  Ask for help. Ask someone to help you who knows how goals must be defined and plans built; someone who will help you to maintain the initial excitement and enthusiasm so it does not evaporate after a good night’s sleep; someone who can help you conquer your fears and past failures and find in you what you might need to reach your goal. Ask for help so you do not have to say again ‘this is just another dream’.

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